Getting Your Kids To Do Their Chores

In many of my blogs, I have talked about chores and kids. I have listed many reasons why doing chores is important for helping to stimulate their executive function skills but I have never really discussed how to get your kids to actually do the chores. It can be a whole other battle at times.

It really depends on your parenting style because there are many schools of thought. I hate to nag and my kids, of course, hate to be nagged.

• Reward systems:
  • Tie chores being done to their allowance. The basic idea is that if you had an actual job, you would get paid and if you didn’t do your job, you wouldn’t get paid. I don’t particularly like this idea and I have never used it because I believe helping to clean the home is just part of home life.
  • Use a chore chart to earn points for a prize. This system is fairly good for younger children. I prefer prizes that don’t cost anything or at least don’t cost much like choosing dinner meals, choosing a Friday night movie at home, or having a sleep over.
  • Similar system to the chore chart but with poker chips. The chips are worth different points as are the jobs. This system works better for older kids. The idea is to let kids pick the jobs they want to do, therefore they earn what they are willing to work. Cleaning the bathroom including the toilet is certainly worth more than dusting their room.
• Make it fun
  • Race the clock! Set a timer and see if they can beat it.
  • Race each other! Who can dust their room the fastest?
  • Play music loudly and dance while cleaning.
  • For younger kids, pretend you are the characters from a book you are reading together.
  • Pretend you are the characters of a movie.
  • My mom used to hide coins on the furniture for me to find while I was dusting. If I had the right amount at the end of dusting then I did a good job; if not then I had to dust again.
  • Clean or pick up belongings by color or by themes (all the parts to a particular toys, dust everything that is wood, vacuum only rugs).
• Just some good basics
  • Never make chores a punishment.
  • Make sure your expectations are clear.
  • Have a specific day or time for chores.
  • Let them see you doing chores.
  • If chores are not being done, find out what your kid is doing instead. Stop everything and talk about your expectations. (Homework and chores first and then play time)
  • Consider have a parent-student contract for older students.
  • Consider writing a family contract.
  • I have been known to get a kid to wake my kids up a few minutes early to do a chore from the night before. It tends to help the memory rather well.

My family has a family contract. We do daily chores before or after homework-their chose. I let my kids choose cooking and dishes nights based on what other activities they have going on. One of my daughters uses a wheelchair so her chores are slightly different based on what she is physically capable of doing. (She is actually better at doing her chores than her siblings and is always the first one to offer help.) On days when we are cleaning the whole house, we play loud music and we together, sometimes with a timer. We have never used a reward system. Our reward was usually a family dinner in the den and watching a movie together when they were younger; now that they are older they are fairly motivated to clean quickly so they can go do something they would rather be doing.